Hivemind Times Issue #67

Welcome To The Hivemind Times!

EXTRA EXTRA! Now why the hell did old paperboys yell that. Whatever, we aren't here to figure that shit out. We are here to celebrate friendship and music and the power that they both possess. 

This week we dropped some second channel madness on your heads with an upcoming How did it age, which has been so much fun having the patreon and youtube members pick the film. Next week I need you guys to prepare for a monster on the main channel video that will shake you to your core so please eat a good breakfast. 

In other news Shedeur Sanders will lead me to the promised land or I will give up all faith in this earthly plane. 

Enjoy your weekend beasts.

- Riley & Graydon

ALBUM RECS

I know you guys have been begging me for an early 80s eccentric freak record. Here ya go!. 

The Cleaners from Venus album Midnight Cleaners. I’ve been searching for an og cassette of this album for awhile so if anyone has one hmu. If you like Sada Bonaire, Arthur Russell, Durutti Column you will eat this record up. 

Wear some big hair put on some intense eye liner and just freak off.

- Graydon

SPORTS

Shedeur has the opportunity to be a legend and you can’t make me unbelieve that.

I get it he looked like poop against the Ravens when he was thrusted into a game he was unprepared for. That will not make me lose faith. I have it on good authority Kevin Stefanski and Tommy Reese don’t believe in him, that doesn’t affect me. 

There’s a similar cool and calm demeanor and confidence he displays that reminds me of Baker his rookie year. I understand the difference between a number one pick and a fifth round pick couldn’t be much wider but hear me out. 

Shedeur will be the 42nd starting quarterback for the Browns since 2000, wrap your little minds around that. It’s an insane situation for anyone no matter where they were picked to go into and I think it really does take a kind of inflated self confidence to be able to convince the fans and the team that the buck stops at you. 

There’s 100 things I could point to that made me believe Dillon G wasn’t that dude but most importantly he lacked the it factor, Primetime Jr does not. I truly hope he goes out and balls. I’m happy to have a reason to be excited to watch a 2-8 team and if you wish him ill there’s something wrong with you. 

Save me king from this suffering.

- Graydon

THE LATEST JOURNAL FROM SHVINGI INGËBÖRKSEN

Daydreams on Prickishness and Punishment

Shout out to Thomas Aikenhead, the last man executed in England for the charge of heresy in January 1697 (Ben Frank was born less than ten years later!).

He was studying at the University of Edinburgh and apparently spent “over twelve months” having arguments with people about how Christianity is a sham.  The prosecutor alleged Thomas had called the “New Testament the History of the Imposter Christ, and affirming him to have learned magic in Egypt, and that coming from Egypt to Judea, he picked up a few ignorant blockish fellows, whom he knew by his skill and physiognomy, had strong imaginations, and that by the help of exalted imagination, he played his pranks as you blasphemously termed the working of his miracles.”

Somewhat similarly, Socrates was forced to drink hemlock after being convicted of corrupting the minds of Athenian youth.  No need to deep dive what Socrates was all about, but it’s fair to say that he asked a lot of questions.  And encouraged his acolytes to go around questioning everything, too.  This is a pretty annoying thing to do under normal circumstances–even more so in a highly unstable political climate in the Hellenistic world.

When forced to put on a defense, Socrates refused to propose any alternative punishments, referred to himself as “God’s gift” to the Athenians, and said he should be receiving free food for all of the great things he had done.  You might understand why many of his peers thought he was a prick.

Tom and Soc reminds me of some people you meet at school that are too smart for their own good and cannot abide perceived stupidity.  Something within them forces them to point it out, often to their own detriment.  For example, I had a friend in high school who was nearly killed at after-prom because he kept insisting that some stranger was mispronouncing a word and referring to him as a “dumb bitch.”  There has to be some element of masochism, lack of social awareness–probably a cocktail of both.  

What happens to these people?  In 20-year old troublemaking Tom’s case, he was hanged.  Hanged for shit-talking the gospels and characterizing the apostles as cretins.  The high school friend I think is gainfully employed somewhere?  Couldn’t tell you.

Truth is a standalone concept.  By what vessel delivers the truth matters a lot, particularly when no one wants to hear it.  17th century Scottish people apparently did not want to hear a (probably) insufferable young adult dunking on God to all of his friends and teachers.

How then, does one talk their shit without getting killed?  And it is a more serious question now than in the recent past.  Because frankly, we are probably not getting rid of the innate human tendency to want to remove those loudly going against the grain.

Colorful, fun, short form video?

- Shvingi

SPORTS - GRANT EDITION

Hello it’s Grant. Usually what seems to be a lull in excitement for world football has been anything but as this international break has produced some incredible stories for the 2026 World Cup being hosted by North America.

Cape Verde, Curaçao, Jordan, and Uzbekistan all qualified for the first time, with Curaçao becoming the smallest nation to ever qualify. On top of that, how can we not get a little bit emotional about Scotland and Norway? Andy Robertson’s post match interview brought a smile to my face and a tear to my eye as he reminisced on talks about World Cup qualification with Jota.

Norway qualify for their first world cup since the late 90’s as it will be Haaland and Ødegaards first world stage appearances (dark horse alert).

This is shaping up to be an incredibly exciting 2026 World Cup, and I would love to try and organize some sort of thing we can do together. Perhaps submitting a bracket, with the winner being the person with most games correct. As we get closer we’ll iron out the details.

- Grant

THIS WEEK’S COMICS

MERCH