Hivemind Times Issue #4

Welcome To The Hivemind Times!

Week 4 is finally here and it might be the best yet!

We’ve stocked this sucker to the brim. You got an exclusive Ro Ramdin interview like you’ve never seen here before. You got Riley’s opinion on the sexy new Sabrina Carpenter album, a debut movie review from Eden Burke, and Cronk is back with an album rec. Not to mention Grant came through with a beef stew recipe and Graydon collabed with a lawyer to make the sexiest RnB playlist ever.

Enjoy and have fun!

- Riley & Graydon

WEEKLY PLAYLIST

Graydon and his pal Huntley create the greatest RnB playlist you have ever heard.

Brackets on the Unlimited Channel

MOVIE REVIEW

Blink Twice (2.75/5)

Your favorite movie girl spoils a movie you should probably never go see

Wow! My first commissioned piece in a publication. I have so many people to thank that lead me to this moment, but I’m so overwhelmed with gratitude I can’t remember any of their names.

Let me start off by saying I respect the fuck out of multi-hyphenates. I think within the film industry there are so many hoops to jump through at every turn, and to truly have creative freedom over anything you do, you have to be leading the set, and you have to have some sort of leverage. Zoe Kravitz's directorial debut is a celebratory feat in that regard. It feels stylistically specific, it feels like she told the story how she wanted to tell it - which I can champion.

However, I am not sure this was the right story to tell nor the right way to tell it. While many components of the film feel thorough and flushed out, like an amazingly paced edit, a hard hitting soundtrack, and sturdy performances from a very eclectic cast, the bones of this film are brittle. This happens a lot when a film with a similar theme in previous years does really well and ingrains itself in the zeitgeist.

Take Parasite, for example - when “eat the rich” was all anyone had to say in Hollywood for the next 3 years, and the movies being released under this umbrella went from meh to bad to worse ie: Triangle of Sadness, The Menu, and Glass Onion. A similar pattern has happened here at the expense of Blink Twice. Emerald Fenell had made a one of a kind movie with Promising Young Woman, a thoughtful piece about sexual and power abuse that so many women face and often are forced to hide. Many have tried to piggyback on the success of PYW and while the original has a profound rawness to it, its followers feel cheap and copied.

I think Blink Twice was missing its true point of view, and its clunky dialogue, predictability, and perverse ending (honestly wtf was that) does not help make it clear. I would be so curious to see how Kravitz could take on a stripped-back drama, without all the bells and whistles of Blink Twice, to get a better idea of her voice, not just as a filmmaker, but as a storyteller. 

- Eden

ALBUM RECS

Let the guitar workings of Algernon Cadwallader take you away to a better place. This is Midwest emo at its absolute best. Get this one loaded up for fall ‘cause if you’re an emotional little bitch like me, then you’re gonna need it.

- Cronk 

ALBUM REVIEW

“Short n’ Sweet” by Sabrina Carpenter

Okay I know this album’s been out for a few weeks and I should be talking about Imaginal Disk (a legitimately fantastic album and serious AOTY contender) but my brain processed these thoughts faster so here we are. 

Let’s get this out of the way, I think Sabrina Carpenter is a talented singer and a charismatic performer. But at some point in my S-Carp listening journey (idk if they call her that btw, just trying shit out), I started to feel a surge of hater energy within me. Now I consider myself a poptimist, so all the hating I do today is not a criticism of Sabrina herself, but the big EVIL pop machine she functions within. So let’s start from the beginning and I'll tell you exactly where the hater energy started to creep in.

When “Espresso” came out, I was sure I'd heard the name Sabrina Carpenter somewhere but I wasn’t sure why I knew who she was. At first I was like “oh yeah this is catchy” and then I was like “wait this sounds a lot like Say So by Doja Cat,” but it was bright, summery and just quirky enough to pull it off. A few interesting choices (like saying “that’s that me espresso” and “switch it up like Nintendo” in the hook of a potential #1 song) elevated this song from run-of-the-mill radio slop to something we were all forced to have an opinion about. 

S-Carp followed this up with “Please Please Please,” her second consecutive Billboard #1 Single and her first to garner universal critical acclaim. She had nailed the perfect balance of great songwriting, a very singable chorus and JUICY hollywood gossip - as the song was pretty clearly about her new boy-toy and prince of rodent boy summer (again idk if they were calling it this, I’m just spit-balling), Saltburn star Barry Keoghan. Unfortunately this is where the hater energy started to slowly creep in… As Sabrina sings “please don’t embarrass me motherfucker” on this otherwise very good pop song, she puts on a little southern country twang. I can’t even put my finger on why this bothered me, but it signified something about the approach she might take on her upcoming full-length project. 

Now there is a small twist in this story… and here it is… the twist that is. “Taste” came out and I was back on board. This song ROCKS. It’s got a slinky little guitar lick, impressive vocal runs in the verses, some LaLaLa’s and a hook that hits like an all-pro defensive end. And forgive me if I'm stepping out of line, but I think a pop song all about how the next girl is gonna have to taste her box when she kisses her ex is EXACTLY what 2024 needed.

So I went into this album with my hater energy mostly at bay, ready to crown S-Carp as the next queen of pop and predict a Grammy sweep for 2025. But as I listened to Short N’ Sweet, I felt that surge again… and by the end of its 36 minute run-time, a sense of disappointment washed over me like a cold shower.  As I listened through, I couldn’t help but hear so many other artists… but a different one from track to track: Ariana on “Good Graces” & “Bed Chem,” Taylor Swift on “Sharpest Tool” & “Lie to Girls,” Olivia Rodrigo on “Coincidence,” Kacey Musgraves on “Dumb & Poetic,” even Dolly Parton on “Slim Pickins.”

While I don’t mind a lot of the songs on this record, I started to wonder where the real Sabrina Carpenter was amongst it all. It’s well-produced and I 100% understand the appeal. I just left not really knowing who she is as an artist. At best, Short N’ Sweet is a pop star searching for her sound. At worst, it’s just the big EVIL pop machine having their artist try on 12 different outfits to see which ones the general public like her in most. 

Favorite Songs: Taste, Good Graces, Juno, Bed Chem, Please Please Please

Least Favorite Songs: Dumb & Poetic, Sharpest Tool, Slim Pickins, Coincidence

- Riley

Hater addendum: Some of the lyrics on this thing gave me acid reflux. 

Here are a few highlights:

1. “Jack off to lyrics by Leonard Cohen”

2. “Cum right on me, i mean camaraderie”

3. “I bet the thermostat’s set at six nine”

4. “You do somethin’ sus, kiss my cute ass bye”

5. “All the douchebags in my phone, play em like a slot machine”

6. “And since the Lord forgot my gay awakening, then i’ll just be here in the kitchen servin’ up some moanin’ and bitchin’”

7. “What a surprise your phone just died, your car drove itself from L.A. to her thighs”

8. “Whole package babe I like the way you fit, God bless your dad’s genetics, mmm”

9. “A boy who’s jacked and kind, can’t find his ass to save my life”

10. “The boy doesn’t even know the difference between ‘there,’ ‘their’ and ‘they are’”

INTERVIEW TIME!

The exclusive Ro Ramdin interview

RILEY’S TWITTER DRAFTS

RECIPES

Yeah that’s right, it’s god damn fall and ain’t nothing better than a beef stew. I make this shit every year because it’s easy and feeds SO many people. This recipe can easily feed 8-10 people, so you can cut the recipe in half if you don’t have that many heads. 

What you need…

For the beef:

6 pounds of stewing beef trimmed and cubed (more if you like, but this is a lot). You can buy this already trimmed and cut from Kroger to save some time, or you can buy a big (6lb) chuck roast and chop it up yourself to control the size of each beefy beef bite
Garlic powder
Salt
Pepper
Olive oil

For the stew:

2 WHOLE White/ Sweet Onion chopped the fuck up like crazy
12 Cups of Beef Broth
2 Pounds of Red Potatoes, cut into cubes (I like to keep the skin on, but that is optional) if you do leave the skin on WASH THEM THOROUGHLY unless you nasty
10 Carrots ripped out of the ground (not the baby carrots) chopped into like an inch each
10-12 Stalks of Celery, chopped into pieces
I like to add a lil splash of red wine to the broth but this is also optional (1 Cup)
6 tablespoons of Tomato Paste
4 Tablespoons of Cornstarch
A couple bay leaves, and some rosemary

I don’t like peas but if you’re a peahead I know people throw that in there too, I’d say like 1.5-2 cups

What you’ll do…

Prep all your veg first: Dice your onions, cut your potatoes, 1 inch slice your carrot, and turn your celery smacked into bite size pieces.

Season your beef with salt, pep, and garlic powder.  Throw it into a hot pan w/ a splash of olive oil and sear it on all sides till it gets a lil brown then REMOVE and REST (DON'T COOK ALL THE WAY THROUGH).

Next, light up your huge ass pot on the stove on high, and dump in your onions and a lil splash of olive oil - get those suckers nice and browned. Once the room smells like the best scent of all time, add your tomato paste and let the onions and paste have a lil party.

Once the onions and paste are marinated together nicely (5-8ish min), add in your beef, carrots, celery, and potatoes. 

Immediately after, pour in the beef broth and cup of wine (optional). Just dump it all in there. Then toss 3-4 bay leaves, and a couple stalks of rosemary on top.

If you got a lid for your big ass pot, that’s fire, put it on the big ass pot. 

AS SOON AS IT BEGINS TO BOIL TURN THE HEAT ON LOW.

Now we play the waiting game. Let it cook at a slow rolling simmer for 3 hours or until beef is very tender/ falling apart, this could take up to 4-5 hours, but ideally the longer you can wait the better. If I wanna serve dinner at 7pm, for example, I want to have it all cooking by 3 at the latest. I also like to take the big ass pot’s lid slightly off to add some breathing room.
NOTE: You can’t overcook beef, if you check your beef and it’s still tough, it’s because it needs to keep cooking, NOT because it’s overcooked (Don’t freak out and think you ruined dinner).

Once your beef is nice and liquid, take your cornstarch in a small bowl and add equal parts water that makes a cloudy, thick liquid. This is called a slurry. 

Slowly add your slurry to your big ass pot, this makes your stew broth nice and thick. You can follow the recipe to a T but you can always add more slurry if the thickness of the broth isn’t to your liking. After you add your first round, mix it in with a spoon and give it like 5min to settle in.
NOTE: As you serve yourself and friends and it cools off, it will thicken even more.

Turn the stove off.

You did it! You made a hearty delicious stew for a cold fall/ winter day. I’m so proud of you. 

I like to season my meal with salt and pepper to taste individually, not while the stew is cooking. Serve with nice warm bread and GO CRAZY.

- Grant

MERCH